Lauren’s+LiveLaugh&Love


 * My Philosophy Statement: **

Everyone is tempted and tested in this life and all will ultimately ** fail **. Despite, as humans, our great capacity for ** evil **, there is also an enormous capacity for ** love ** , and a ** goodness ** that lies within each individual. Everyone will make mistakes, and because all have fallen, ** all deserve redemption ** —a second chance.

There is a ** darkness ** inside me     Which might appall the ** devil ** I am feeble and utterly crushed A bounden ** slave ** to mean and filthy vice In the darkness of my dark-beating heart I blush for sin  

I try to hide myself, disguise myself A soul behind a guise It is a ** pretense ** I am troubled by sin; my vanity will not blind God There is no goodness in me   I have fallen There is nothing left to save Don't waste your time trying to fix what I want to forget I don't want your help I am in the ** darkness ** Somewhere alone in the bitterness Crumbling among the jigsaw puzzle of ** despair ** I want to just be left alone

Now it's too late, it's taking over me  A sense of insufferable ** gloom ** pervades my spirit I reserve the greatest bitterness and blame for myself Victim of this evil, scourged by my dungeon They look at me with sad eyes but I don't want their sympathy I would have their forgiveness I'm crying out I'm begging you for mercy My ** guilt ** has overwhelmed me like a burden to heavy to bear I'm torn into pieces I am no longer worthy of living It is ** too late ** to earn my forgiveness There is no going back

I groan in ** anguish ** of heart This thorn in my soul Fills me with guilt The ** darkness ** inside me is fighting to get out I am so much fuller of faults than I imagined My heart is damaged, the light has gone from my eyes It is hard to live with this ** regret ** My legs are giving out under the weight of a problem that seems so big I've given up on everything Poisoned by my actions It's too late now to save me    I'm too ** tangled **



My whole world is the pain inside me    My wounds fester and are ** loathsome ** because my sinful folly Left me in pieces Now all that's left of me is what I pretend to be   Sewn together But there's still a hole inside of me    Slowly ** killing ** me      I'm living like I have a ** death wish ** I damn my own soul better than they ever could Beating myself, screaming every step Yet I persevere in the path Come devil; for to thee is this world given Not everyone is worth saving

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It is error upon error which has caused this utter depression of soul Take my shame away I put myself in your ** broken hands ** I don't need to be fixed What is done once is done forever ** Forgive me, for I have sinned ** I've been dying inside little by little My pretense is ripped away, my perfect world is burning If only you could step in my shoes I'm as damned as I seem Come please, I'm calling I'm faint and ** overburdened ** with the heavy sickness of heart Share my pain

It is the ** darkest ** moment before the dawn Have compassion on me   I'm not the only one who makes mistakes There's a ** dark place ** within everyone I am tired of fighting alone in the bitterness On these hands and knees I'm crawling on   My crime will be punished I have to face my ** demons ** Don't leave me here on my own Save me



A man is a god in ** ruins ** A victim to terrors, broken up deep inside I'm sick of pretending it's not so bad I don't want to waste another day Stuck in the shadow of my mistakes I would give anything to be able to get a ** second chance ** I am as ugly as sin but Let you look sometimes for the ** goodness ** in me   Part of being human is having compassion All kinds of ** evil ** are still on me

It's so easy to get ** lost ** It's me they blame I cannot speak but I am ** doubted ** Wounded by the shouts, straight through my heart There are some things time cannot mend Absolve you to yourself! ** Let you look to your own improvement before you go to judge ** Is the accuser always holy? No one is all good or all bad Your heart is ** dark ** like mine



**I'm strong, but I break **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">You might think I'm bulletproof, but I'm not **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">I make plenty of ****<span style="color: #e4b900; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 21pt;">mistakes **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">If no one wants to look at me for what I really am **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">Hold out your heart to me **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">The love you give me will save me **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">I do think I see some ****<span style="color: #e4b900; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 20pt;">shred of goodness ** **<span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">within me **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">A man never thus tempted certainly never thus fell **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">Look for the best in me **
 * <span style="color: #ffe269; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 17pt;">And I'll leave this life behind me **

<span style="color: #ffdc47; display: block; font-family: 'Blackadder ITC'; font-size: 24pt; text-align: center;">No one can tell me where I alone must go But I start by doing the hardest thing: ** Forgive myself ** <span style="color: #ffdc47; display: block; font-family: 'Blackadder ITC'; font-size: 24pt; text-align: center;">Forgiveness liberates the soul Nothing can bring me peace but myself ** You are not my judge ** <span style="color: #ffdc47; display: block; font-family: 'Blackadder ITC'; font-size: 24pt; text-align: center;">I must take myself, for better or for worse Who are you to tell me that I am ** less ** ?

Just when I thought I couldn't live Fate gave me a ** second chance ** Every ** evil ** which entangled me has been cut to pieces I will never forget the ** disgrace ** But I found the sweetest salvation I'm rising from the ashes of the ghost of me    Like ** gold ** purified through flames This is who I am. Accept it.



<span style="color: #f0c200; display: block; font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva'; font-size: 22pt; text-align: center;">Take a look into the mirror I can be blind no more <span style="color: #f0c200; display: block; font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva'; font-size: 22pt; text-align: center;">No longer will I shrink from my own sin <span style="color: #f0c200; display: block; font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva'; font-size: 22pt; text-align: center;">I am a fighter <span style="color: #f0c200; display: block; font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva'; font-size: 22pt; text-align: center;">I believe in second chances I believe in ** redemption ** For the first time, I do not see a ** dead end ** I see a new ** beginning **



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MP3. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> // Psalms //. //True Images Bible//. NIV ed. New York: Zondervan, 2008. Print. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Rascal Flatts. "What Hurts The Most." MP3. // Redemption in the Rain //. Digital image. //TV Tropes//. Web. 8 Dec. 2010. <http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RedemptionInTheRain>. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Schelhaas, Luke. "Bound." //Smallville//. CBS. Denver, 17 Nov. 2004. Television. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Shakespeare, William. //Macbeth//. Picador Publishing Group, New York: 2001. // Siena Shadow //. Digital image. //Photoflavor//. Web. 8 Dec. 2010. <http://www.photoflavor.com/index.php?id=477>. // Smashed and Broken Heart //. Digital image. //A Line of Hearts Pictures, Photos and Images//. Free Extras. Web. 8 Dec. 2010. <http://free-extras.com/search/3/a+line+of+hearts.htm>. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Silko, Leslie M. //Ceremony//. New York, NY: Penguin, 1986. Print. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Sparks, Jordin. "Permanent Monday." By Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown. //Jordin Sparks//. 19 Recordings, 2007. MP3. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Sparling, Genevieve. "Beast." //Smallville//. CBS. Denver, 30 Apr. 2009. Television. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Sparling, Genevieve. "Roulette." //Smallville//. CBS. Denver, 23 Oct. 2009. Television. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> // Spider-Man 3 //. Dir. Sam Raimi. By Sam Raimi, Ivan Raimi, and Alvin Sargent. Prod. Laura Ziskin, Avi Arad, and Grant Curtis. Perf. Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, and James Franco. Columbia Pictures, 2007. DVD. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Superchick. "Beauty From Pain." //Beauty From Pain 1.1//. MP3. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Swift, Taylor. "Should've Said No." By Taylor Swift. //Taylor Swift//. Big Machine Records, 2006. MP3. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Swift, Taylor. "Tell Me Why." By Taylor Swift. //Fearless//. Big Machine Records, 2008. MP3. Takeshi. Phoenix. Digital image. //Takeshi Collection//. Web. 8 Dec. 2010. <http://my.opera.com/NghiaTAKESHI/albums/showpic.dml?album=655018&picture= Thoreau, Henry David. "Resistance to Civil Government, or Civil Disobedience." Comp. Jessica Gordon and Ann Woodlief. //American Transcendentalism Web//. Virginia Commonwealth University, 1999. Web. Thoreau, Henry David. "Where I Lived, What I Lived For: An Excerpt From Walden." //Walden Pond From Pine Hill//. Pine Hill, 1854. Web. <http://faculty.tamu-commerce.edu/kroggenkamp/Excerpt%20from%20Walden.doc.>. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Underwood, Carrie. "So Small." MP3. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Underwood, Carrie. "Twisted." //Carnival Ride//. MP3. // Victim Girl //. Digital image. //My Manoreal: The Last House On The Left//. Blogspot. Web. 8 Dec. 2010. <http://mahorela.blogspot.com/2009/08/last-house-on-left.html>. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> "Wake The Dead." //Justice League//. CBS. Denver. Television. // Wasted Feelings //. Digital image. //It's Raining Outside//. Blogspot, 26 May 2009. Web. 8 Dec. 2010. <http://drkumar89.blogspot.com/2009_05_01_archive.html>. <span style="line-height: 200%; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric; text-indent: -0.5in;"> Whitehead, Don, and Holly Henderson. "Lazarus." //Smallville//. CBS. Denver, 24 Sept. 2010. 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